Pyaar ke ….After effects.

The story began the day my dear friend Peter met an amazing lady Miss M.

Before that the only ladies in the house apart from family were: Priyanka, Bipasha stuck on the walls, with inviting expressions and not to forget montu the kaamwaali. With such drastic female famine, it was obvious for our Peter to fall for the first lady he gets to meet and ...he did. Its human, this also can be taken as a point to show he is a normal human being, which till date is under scrutiny.

The first meeting: a lot of superficial hello, hi’s and all the formal gestures and sentences full of “ji’s” with the only pronoun that could replace her name “aap”, how come that so instantly people forget the tum, tera , teri, abe, even tumhaare which they have been using day in and day out. Constantly keeping up a fake smile, your mouth aches, and at the back of your mind you are constantly questioning yourself. Why do I have to make up all this? How can this be funny? Have my sense of humor hit a 52 week low somewhat like stock markets? What would have Peter Lynch done in this case or how the present P/E (parental/elope in the present context) ratio be interpreted for future benefits.

On this solemn first date, very little to ask and even less to answer. Not coz there is less to say, but because words have to be chosen cautiously and virtuously put together in a bunch to make a phonetically civilized sentence... oooooph...This is a lot of effort, so better stay mum and all replies should be in monosyllables like…..ji again replacing the “ yes”,” no” and third option “give a smile”…repeat repeat and repeat.

After a few months and number of meetings and round the clock telephonic interviews.. to know about each other as much as possible. First thing is, some nick names are attributed to you, could be something like cutie, poochi, baby, baba, motu, moti and likes. The information exchange has an array of topics from food they ate, to why there is a weight gain/loss, keen observations like falling hair are openly voiced, waking up time to wish good morning is inquired, from what should i wear today, to why the cook did not turn up and now what will they do...etc etc. All along come suggestions for all questions frantically popped out (u need to understand that questions were basically asked to give suggestions). The daily routine took a drastic change, the person who had limited activity at hand: sleep, eat, rock music, single peg of whisky followed by fumes from another half peg to give him a sheersh-asan mudra while asleep. Suddenly, found time for, frequent short walks, weekly long drives, daily after dinner ice-cream sessions........... especially woh chuski types, kulfi's & orange bars, evening fruit juice and chaat-papdi , gol-gappe like spicy stuff, music changed to slow and soft, sleep cycle was governed by the new service provider Reliance, movie selections and movie partners for the same changed accordingly reviews were moulded as per requirement. A new free pick and drop service was started, the earnings were not evaluated on monetary grounds but the time they get to spend together.

Then came up the big question (either of these means the same, so if you have heard or hear this…god save you), Where are we heading? What are your future plans? Do you intend to have an arranged marriage or you have someone in mind? What kind of girl are you looking for to be your wife? ....and sometimes it can be loud and clear something like: Dont you think we should get married? Once these question sessions have started off, they are like the Mumbai monsoons, unpredictable in time, volume and period, even worse they can drown you to unseen levels of insanity. The rains come and go, but they never end, and govt. has no compensation package for this disastrous, self invited, "not so natural" calamity.

The above questions might have a variety but answers are the same… as they say boys will always be boys:

Ans type1) “……………………………………………………..” (that means silence as if u never heard what she said)

Ans type 2) Sorry, I didn’t hear you. Can u just repeat the question?

Ans type 3) Papaji /mataji nahin manengi? Bahut fight hai. Koshish karunga. Don’t you trust me.

Ans type 4…One of my favourites) I thought we were just friends, good friends. I really appreciate your feeling but I don’t intend to hurt you, how come this …. happened?

But our hero made an effort, unlike most guys, a sincere effort, ghar par Rang de basanti ki re-shooting ho gayi, krantikaari mahaul cha gaya. Naare baji ke naam par duur daraaz ke rishteydaar bhi bula liye gaye, usko all four times.: subha dupahar, sham raat yeh yaad dilaya gaya…ki nahin yeh sahin nahin hai. Ladka band bajwaane ke aasha se gaya tha..uski toh kahani da band baj gaya. Now our champ is back to the pavilion in a more realistic way to prepare for his second innings. The match is already decided…sada Peter toh jeetega ji, ladki nahin toh kya life main toh pucca: “In the best moments of your life, you are expressionless, completely blank…you just try to imbibe the moment so that it stays with you for your life time.” Bas aisa hi kuch hone waala hai…”Shaadi “ ladki ki fix hone waali hai jaldi hi probably in the coming few months. All premarital arrangements of dekhna and parakhna have been done, venues decided and all that stuff.

Par ek cheez hai jis se bhayankar jal rahi hai Peter ki, uski naak ke neeche se ekdoosra bhai ladki le gaya woh bhi hamare jaise chapeti chaap haalat ka. And Peter could do nothing except for watching the show…Ab U.P na sahi, shaadi toh hogi, toh "bhaiya ji" ke yaha se hi sahi…udhar bhi jaayegi apna tolee…So, Peter is all set for taking over the responsibilities as a good friend as he has been trying to portray these days. Job profile for this new project is awesome. From distributing cards : as they say” ladke ko bahut anubhav hai shaadi ke kaarad baantnein ka, pehle bhi apni beheno ki shaadi main kaarad baatein hain”. Other stuff includes, arranging the phere ka pandaal, taking care of catering, phoolwala and phoolmala, pandit’s transportation and all the crucial and critical jobs which force him to stay behind the camera. We as a group stand together at this auspicious moment of the “Trio’s togetherness” to help our friend. A friend in need is a friend indeed.