Road to ….nowhere!!!!!

Somebody, wrote the famous lines….

Two roads led to the woods, I took the road less travelled by and that has made all the difference

This is a beautiful thought that has kept me going all this time with motivation that wherever this path may lead it will always be a better life ahead. It isn’t that I have had a change of opinion over this, or I want to turn back from where I am now. It is just that lately the journey is not that smooth, it is unpredictable, confusing, and demanding… coz the road is less travelled by.

I have a job, that I like for ….to be frank for the beyond imagination salary they pay to average guys like us and that means a lot for us, the perks that come along which I don’t think anybody would be willing to provide, the number of leaves I get, the opportunity to go to some of the most beautiful places, some of the harshest condition terrains, to have experiences that are …..not worth missing in this lifetime, my unwillingness to take up a desk job in some NCR/Metro plush company offices, I have somehow made a bond with the people here over time I feel comfortable here…kind of you can say this is my comfort zone. As and actor in Rand De Basanti says, “Idhar DJ ki kuch aukaad hai ,DJ ko log jaante hain .” Similarly, the fear to venture out into the unknown is really frightening, here people know me, I have a say, They accept me equally with the success and failures. I have a somewhat hassle free life here and I have adapted to this, kind of.

But on the other hand I have a family back home, they want me to quit it, as this is not a job where I can go far ahead with. A job in which I can gurantee only one thing, that i am not sure when I will be home. They ask me about my plans to settle down, I keep asking time from them, someday they will surely realize that I am just buying time and not that I am doing something to change the status of things. For them a job with more time at home, even if it is less paying, is what I should look for. Try to come out of this apparent mess, but these are the things that got into this job, things that I like. Moreover, relatives who I really don’t wont interfering with similar issues come up again and again,this pisses me off, as it is very easy to say and get away. I have had a similar experiences earlier, with opinions pouring from all over and decided to take the plunge believing in these free floating opinions available all around. The experience was bitter and I can not afford to go through the ordeal again, neither do I have that stamina now.

I have the option of taking up higher studies in management, but then the similar dilemma. Will I get back at this level financially, or in reputation, and moreover when. Secondly to be near to home is very -very important for me, and somehow here I am getting this, after higher studies where will I be I don’t know. These thoughts are enough to break that spirit of preps. My willingness t o go for mgmt, is born more out of two major factors, firstly , my family wants me to change my present field and they along with me find this as a good option. Secondly, lots of people are doing it and doing fairly well rather at times better off, what they don’t take into account is a realistic comparison. Not all make it to biggies like BCG etc even from the IIM’s. It is good, satisfying, less depressing to accept and target what is achievable within your limits realistically.

This entire thing might make me look like an emotional, indecisive fool…actually that’s what I have made of myself. I am unable to proceed because this time the decisions I would like to make them by choice rather than they being a result of lack of choices, as it has been all these years. So, here begin the tough times, but I have a companion watching over me from there all the time, and he will take me where I am destined to be, I have faith in him.